Gindi Vincent

The Dish on Career, Fashion, Faith, and Family

Women

2020 – The Ellipsis

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Today, it is 2020.

As my brother in law said this morning, welcome to the roaring ’20s.

For me, this new decade didn’t come in roaring. It came in in a fog.

I’m in a fog.

I left on the 26th for Minnesota to spend a few days with my best friend, Kristin, and attend her son’s funeral, and returned on the 30th. A quick turn around of my carry on bag at the house, and then I left with my family for the farm. As is our New Year’s Eve tradition.

Two of Bray’s siblings and families were there, along with his parents, and the kids popped fireworks last night and laughed and ran and drank too much soda. I posted photos on social media, as I do, and my daughter and I even snapped a photo of us with me smiling.

It felt fake.

I didn’t smile much the rest of the time. Isaac wasn’t even my son but I have been heartbroken. I can’t focus or function for very long. I’m completely sleep deprived. Last week, I slept with the phone in my hand in case Kristin needed anything in the middle of the night. She never did, but somehow me not sleeping felt like I was helping. Then I never get any sleep at the farm, and little bit got sick, so I’m bleary in my fog.

I just didn’t have a bright and shiny New Year’s post to offer.

Last year I wrote about resolutions and hopes. And this year, I don’t know how I’m going to be able to work this week. I’ve left a part of myself in Minnesota and I just want to get back. (It’s actually a miracle I got out – thank you all for praying. I ran from the snow in Marshall and got out 6 hours in advance, and then my plane just beat the snow in Minneapolis by hours too.)

At the same time, I don’t want to let go of my kids. I kept hugging and kissing them once I got back until they finally pushed me off.

As I plowed through emails today, a GetAbstract book title caught my attention, You are Awesome, by Neil Pasricha. The book professes to help you through change and failure and be more intentional. So I started reading.

His first point is what struck me and finally enabled me to write something. Like I’ve meant to for weeks.

He writes to see changes with an ellipsis instead of a period. It moves your thinking from “finality” to “future” – the gap in the sentence marks a transition. He wrote about a woman who saw a change through the lens of an ellipsis instead of a period. Seeing changes as beginnings instead of endings helped her to press forward and remain stronger internally.

This ‘door opening’ perspective, according to the author and his research, gives you the ability to say “yet” at the end of your sentence.

So, I don’t have any catchy resolutions. I don’t have any grand bargains or promises, which I most certainly will fail to execute.

I have an ellipsis for this year. A ‘yet.’

I don’t understand God, yet. (That yet may never be fulfilled this side of heaven.)

I can’t focus on my work, yet. (I’ll get there. It will be far easier for me than for Isaac’s family.)

I don’t know what’s next, yet. (Maybe I won’t know until the next happens, and so I wait.)

This fog won’t lift, yet. (It will lift. The light shines in the darkness and the darkness has not overcome it. – John 1)

As a Type A planner, this is the most unplanned I’ve ever been. Darn near unraveling.

But maybe it takes unraveling to pull together what God has planned instead of what I planned. The dictionary says unraveling means to undo twisted, knitted or woven threads. And Colossians 2 says:
I want you woven into a tapestry of love, in touch with everything there is to know of God. Then you will have minds confident and at rest, focused on Christ, God’s great mystery. (The Msg)

So I don’t know, yet, what to expect or want from 2020. Maybe simply to expect or want this unraveling to result in a new tapestry that is woven by the hand of God.

Rejoicing after weeping.
Clothes of joy after grief in sackcloth. (Psalm 30)

Peace through tribulation. (John 16)

Beauty from ashes.
Hope from despair.
Rebuilt and restored ruins after devastation.(Isaiah 61)

Friday Finds: Favorite Things

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Merry Christmas Friends! A week out and short of a just the perfect thing for one of your people? Well I got you!

Today, instead of Fashion Friday, we’re talking Friday Finds! That’s right, I crowd-sources some favorite things and BOY DID I HIT THE JACKPOT!

There is no possible way I can cover all the great items I got in my Facebook post, so head over to Facebook and check out the public post dated December 12th if you don’t see what you need here.

There is so much material, I’m going to test some of these out and come back to this Favorite Things post again!

But I’ll try to break some of the items up into categories and tackle them. My favorite comments were some of the intangible ‘favorite things’ – laughter, smell of cut grass, etc. Ah. That’s what’s really the best!

Also, I’ll add my own two cents if you’re looking for a favorite thing for a friend or family member: EXPERIENCES!

Last night, Bray and I took the kids to Holiday Lights at Constellation Field. Just the time together, looking at lights and roasting smores on the fire pit and decorating gingerbread houses, that was the best thing ever. I’m trying to do a family surprise date once a month. It won’t always happen, but last month we all went to see Ford v. Ferrari at a theater that served food and this month was Holiday Lights. Who knows what next month will bring!?!?!

Okay, here goes!

CATEGORY APPS:

  • Voxer – this is how I talk to my best friend every day, you don’t need to know anything other than to download it and get your friends to do it too;
  • Paprika 3 – apparently the best recipe collection app out there which enables you not to just collect your fav recipes but to categorize them by holidays etc;
  • Hopper – this will tell you the days that are cheapest to travel and if your fare is going to go up or down;
  • Down Dog Yoga – an easy download to add strength and stretching into your daily routine.

CATEGORY COSMETICS/HAIR:

  • Revlon one step hair dryer – This one got a TON of traffic with all sorts of people in all sorts of corners saying that this is life changing, it is in my Amazon basket friends (also the Dyson hair dryer got a shout out for frizzy hair);
  • Eye shadow primer – I was not familiar with this cosmetic tool but several friends swear by it, one says that Target’s ELF brand is all you need while another recommends Too Faced – the key being that your mascara won’t be all over your face anymore;
  • MAC Lipstick – this was a recommendation I can whole heartedly endorse, I love MAC lipsticks and our nominator says that their Russian Red looks fabulous on everyone;
  • Mary Kay eye make up remover – again, this is a product I use so when I saw it nominated I jumped right in – I have never found a better eye make up remover out there (you can see I basically dabble in almost every make up brand);
  • Stila eyeliner – several friends swear by this waterproof eyeliner;
  • Cle de peu concealer – Revolutionary according to my friend, and I’m sort of obsessed with concealers (I report after four hours of sleep last night), but IT Bye Bye Under Eye Concealer also got the favorite things nod and it is more affordable;
  • Invisibobble Traceless ponytail holder – keeps your ponytail from pressing a crease into your hair and won’t result in those awful ponytail headaches.

CATEGORY HOME GOODS:

  • Electric tea kettle – this was another top vote getter, lots of folks swear by these and have them for work and for home, one recommended was the Cuisinart kettle;
  • Gas fireplace – several nods for the benefit of curling up to a good book in front of a gas fireplace and I’m cozy just thinking about it;
  • Portable clothing steamer – a must for travelers to have in their carry on;
  • Sticker You – perfect personalized labels for kids young and old (and I’ve used Name Bubbles too);
  • Hobonichi Cousins Planners and Covers – I had paper planners for years, this year I went full electronic, but this friend’s hearty recommendation may make me return to having a paper version.

CATEGORY FOOD/DRINK:

  • Nutella stuffed chocolate chip cookies by ambitious kitchen – messy to make but worth it says my friend who adds this to her list;
  • Peanut butter fudge – easy and addictive, melt one tub of peanut butter and one tub of icing in the microwave, mix together and refrigerate;
  • Parmesan crisps – while this was someone else’s top pick, it’s also one of my go to snacks;
  • Lolea red sangria – comes in full and mini sizes at Cost Plus;
  • Apple cider mimosas – ‘nuff said;
  • Amici Cab – tastes like a $200 cab for closer to $40 (loved hearing this because I just grabbed their Pinot for a dinner party);
  • Frago mints – the beauty of chocolate and mint, this is the original.

CATEGORY FUNNIEST:

I don’t know why, but these cracked me up:

  • Whataburger ketchup – apparently no other ketchup comes close;
  • Earbags – do you imagine an earlobe holding a purse, well don’t, because apparently it is a headband-less set of ear muffs;
  • Pickle salsa – seriously y’all, these are little bit’s two favorite food groups, I’m totally trying this as a hysterical as it sounds!

Okay friends, you should be all set for the holidays now!

But don’t stop now! Sound off in the comments and give us YOUR favorite things!!! Food, hack, app, make up, travel destination, YOU PICK IT!

Fashion Friday: Super Skinny Saga

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There is an epidemic sweeping the U.S. You’ve seen it if you’ve ventured into a store or shopped on-line this year. It is SKINNY jeans. And if that’s not enough for you, then there’s SUPER SKINNY jeans.

Which brings us to today’s Fashion Friday. For those of us who sigh in collective horror, let’s tackle the Super Skinny Jean epidemic in fashion.

Why am I up in arms over this fashion? Well, first of all, both little bit and I have been jeans shopping this month. She’s a girl’s size 10 and I’m a ladies size 12. She is super skinny and I am super not.

So arguably, if the fashion was going to work for someone, it would work for one of us on either end of the size spectrum.

It does not.

She will tell you, she hates super skinny. Regular ole skinny isn’t much better.

Where will you find this trend? The better question is where won’t you. Thus far, the super skinny look is dominating the following stores which we regularly frequent: Gap, Old Navy, Banana Republic, Target, Abercrombie, Levi, Express, Nordstrom, Macy’s, J. Crew, Justice, and on and on. It doesn’t help if you go to a department store. I tried Seven for All Mankind, Joe’s, Lauren, etc., and they were all skinny fit. And, I might add, they are running SHORT which is a crime if you’re 5’10 and don’t want to look like you’re wading through a river! (Or worse than super skinny, the jegging. Y’all, this is a legging not a jean!)

Seriously.

(From top to bottom, Justice, J. Crew, Old Navy, and Joe’s from Dillard’s. This is just a VERY small sample size of the skinny epidemic! And note, they’re not just SKINNY but they are often also high-waisted and ankle length – these are all bad things if you just want a normal pair of jeans!)

So what is a girl to do if you don’t actually want jeans plastered to your thighs, be you skinny or curvy? My girlfriend and I were discussing this over breakfast and have come up with a few options for all of you suffering under the same skinny jeans oppression as the Vincent girls.

One of my favorite brands, hand’s down, is Kut from Cloth. I love their fit and their longevity. I’ve had my first pair for years and finally bought my second pair. They’re a little pricey for me, they run close to $100, but in the normal sized jeans desert, I splurged. These are their Natalie bootcut jeans, but they have tons of styles and they run $89 at Nordstrom. (I also tried Lucky, similar cut, and I liked them but the color was too bright – I like my denim darker.)

J. Crew is not ALL skinny. They have straight, wide leg, curvy, boyfriend… My friend swears by boyfriend for her figure, but they don’t fit me right and I don’t care for how most of them are cuffed. Here is the straight trouser and their curvy boot cut. Normally these run over $100, but they’re on sale for 35% off.

If you’re looking for a bargain, then I’d typically send you to Old Navy. However, I have found they are the worst offender of the super skinny. Some of my fav jeans are their curvy style. Well they are out of that style for now, but I just found a gorgeous straight-legged style which I’m wearing today and they’re soft, stylish, and a bargain at HALF PRICE for $18. Can you believe it? (Plus we should all buy from Old Navy because they give you the option of seeing the jeans on a size 4 model or a size 10 model – this is the size 10 model, thank you so much Old Navy!)

There are others. You have to hunt. I tried on OVER 20 pairs of jeans just to find two pair that worked. Little bit is STILL on the hunt because the epidemic is even worse for girls (plus she is super freakish about fabrics – send help!). Sigh. Between skin tight jeans and micro-mini shorts and skirts, I am disgusted with girls fashion right now. But you already know that.

What say you? Do you love the super skinny? Don’t worry, I’ll still be your friend if you do 🙂

Fashion Friday: Hear It Roar, Animal Prints

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I have been in malls too much lately. It’s a whole other post. About how I’m incapable of dressing in cute casual. I always need help. Maybe you’ll get that post next week.

So… that led me to observe a TON of fall trends. But there is one far more obvious than any other.

As a result, today’s Fashion Friday: Hear It Roar, Animal Prints. Mercy me. Animal prints are everywhere. There are cheetahs and snakes and zebras and leopards. Oh my. But let me tell you, it is lovely. And I’m digging it all.

Where do you put these animal prints, you ask? Well, apparently this season, you wear it everywhere. Literally you can wear it head to toe (though I don’t recommend it).

One thing that’s new in all over animal print is DRESSES.  They are EVERYWHERE.   I saw one at work last week, which was gorgeous, and then boom, they were in every store window.  This one from Loft, at 40% off today, is less than $50 – that is crazy!  Banana Republic has animal print dresses in all sorts of prints and styles but my fav right now is this zebra midi dress.  There are a TON of animal print midi dresses, BTW.  Just search for them on Nordstrom’s website.  Here’s one that comes in under $150 from Eliza J but they come in every cut and print imaginable. 

Of course, I think it’s usually easier to pull off a print this bold in pieces.  And mercy are there pieces.  Try infusing your fall wardrobe with a little animal print in any of the lovely sweaters and blouses on the market right now.  Including this really interesting pin tuck cheetah print from Banana, a nice casual long sleeved tee from Nordstrom, and this super cute blouse from Target (love how it’s styled too!)

My all time favorite spot to throw an animal print on is a shoe.  And everyone has an animal print shoe this season.  I have a snake skin one now and a new block leopard print (remember, blocks are back). 

Here is a Snake Print ankle boot and cheetah pump from Banana Republic.  But DSW has plenty if you want to stay on budget.  Even Loft had a fun flat.  These Sam Edelman kitten heel boots will add a splash of interest to any fall outfit and they don’t break the bank at $80.   Now Target had this style of sandal, but I don’t know if it’s still in stock; it’s more expensive in Steve Madden from DSW but I bet you can find this style in lots of spots.  These are the block pumps I picked up a couple weeks ago and I love them.  Super comfortable and versatile.

It’s not just tops and dresses and shoes.  Animal print is on everything.  Check out this leopard reversible poncho from Loft and calf hair belt. I’m loving Loft this fall.  Heck, Banana has prints on everything from belts to bras – I can’t even show you everything they have in their animal print game.  Target’s not going to miss out on the party. You could add their animal print tote to your fall wardrobe.

What say you? How do you do animal prints? What’s your favorite?

Fashion Friday: The Block Heel

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Hello Fashion Friday friends!  I’ve missed you.  I have all these fashion posts running around in my head and no time to write them.  But today we’re talking shoes.  One of my favorite topics.  I won’t even tell you how my daughter is growing to love shoes.  Uh-oh.  I can’t get her to buy clothes but shoes she is 110% there!  This could be a problem. 

But the shoes we’re talking about today, she doesn’t really have a need for yet. 

For today’s Fashion Friday: The Block Heel.  I used to hate block heels.  But they are coming in with a vengeance, they even have their own category on some shoe websites, and there are some super cute ones.  Not to mention they are massively easier to walk in than my old school spikey narrow heel!

I work on a corporate campus that is large and involves a lot of walking.  As a result, I’ve resorted more and more to flats (sigh) and wedges.  Now that the block heel is sweeping the fashion pages, I have a fun new alternative.  I just purchased my first pair, a pointy snake print that I adore, and I have no problem hiking all over my campus in these nearly 3 inchers. 

So what am I loving in the block?  Well, it isn’t just heels.  But it definitely starts with heels. 

For work, I love these Tahari pumps in baby blue. I’m about to write a post on why you should be buying shoes in all colors, but this will get you off to a smashing start.  If you must stick with black, then do it in a fun way.  And these Adrienne Vittadini black blocks are all fun.  Absolutely work appropriate but more interesting than a standard black block heel!

On the sandal front, you know I’m living in Texas where it is 101 degrees in September so you can absolutely have fall sandals here, you have OODLES of options. 

These “mauve” (I can’t believe I’m recommending mauve – does anyone feel the 1980s?  Not with these!) sandals are the priciest on my list, the only ones coming in over $100, but they’re Marc Jacobs and really fun.  If you have a birthday gift card to DSW, this might be a fun place to spend it.  And in suede, they’re CLEARLY a fall sandal! Can you believe these cognac ones are Clark’s?  I really didn’t know they had cute shoes and these would be comfy to boot. 

Speaking of boots, if you don’t live in a place where it is triple digits in the FALL (don’t judge me for being bitter), then there are some fabulous boot block options too. 

My first offering is an ankle boot from Steve Madden in a fabulous snake print, the same print as my block heel, that will go with everything you wear and add a little spice (and not of the pumpkin variety).  This rich chocolate brown Franco Sarto bootie would be a classic addition for any fall wardrobe.  If you’re uncertain about the pointy toe, I love a good point, go up a half size to give you wiggle room (literally).  And while I usually veto a brown flat, I love me a good brown boot.

A word of caution: if you tend to have thicker ankles and lower leg, then just be careful on the block heel. Some can result in a look that is even thicker. But certain styles definitely work – just check it out in a full length mirror. This is true for everyone trying on shoes. Don’t rely on those little foot mirrors! Find a full length mirror, and also pick up your trouser if you’re not in a skirt to get the full look.

What about you? Are you loving the block trend? How do you wear them?