Gindi Vincent

The Dish on Career, Fashion, Faith, and Family

Fashion Friday: Fall Trends – Plaid

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Welcome back to Fashion Friday and our four part series on fall’s latest fashion trends.

Last week we discussed the glorious resurgence of NAVY!

Today, we discuss the trend there is NO WAY you have missed: PLAID!

Plaid, plaid, everywhere is plaid.

Now I wouldn’t typically fall for this lumberjack look, but it’s being incorporated in interesting ways and interesting colors so it feels less “lumberjack-y.”

If you have bought any fall clothing, you got assaulted with plaid.

I’ve not seen such a universal trend since the attack of the prairie dresses during COVID (and they linger still…). 

How can you incorporate it into your fall look?

Well, if you’re not nuts about the trend, try something small like this cute boot from DSW or a little accessory (and do you see all the plaid incorporating navy?!?!):

If you’re willing to go bolder, I just picked up this wonderfully vibrant plaid wrap for a steal at LOFT (and not only does it incorporate the plaid trend, it also incorporates the navy and wrap trends!).  I’ve got a girls weekend to the wine country in a few weeks and thought this would be a fun addition:

My best friend nabbed this adorable plaid jacket from Target and makes the typical lumberjack ensemble look feminine because of colors and styling.  And also, she’s gorgeous which helps (my daughter announced from the back seat when Kristin was in for the icepocalypse, “sorry mom, but she looks like she’s in her 20s”):

I’m also exercising all my self-restraint not to pick up this Hutton blazer from Ann Taylor – I love this look so much! Making plaid professional and pretty:

Are you wearing plaid? How are you incorporating it into your fall wardrobe (which is super hard in Houston this week at 90 degrees!)?  Any guesses as to next week’s trend?  A hint – roar…

Fashion Friday: Fall Trends – Navy

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We’re baaaaack!

Oh y’all – I have MISSED Fashion Fridays!

My daughter asked me last week if I was going to write any more fashion posts.  I said, well there really hasn’t been a lot to write about.

With a global pandemic and office attire consisting of yoga pants with cute accessories on a Zoom call, and then a return to “fashion” last year with all the designers phoning it in, I haven’t had much fodder.

I’m sorry if you are loving your new wardrobe of Little House on the Prairie dresses, but it is my fervent hope they make their ways off the shelves in the not to distant future.

I’m not bashing maxi dresses, in fact I’m a new convert, but all the flowers everywhere. And some really bad fabric.

Mercy.

But that is not what brings us back together again!

Good fashion is making an appearance. And we are going to talk about it. 

The next four weeks I’m going to talk about what’s out there that’s worth wearing, IMHO.

I couldn’t be more excited to talk about NAVY on today’s Fashion Friday.

A color? You’re talking about a color, you ask?

Yes. Because this color does not get its fair due.  It’s one of my absolute favorite staples but can be impossible to find many seasons.

Navy looks amazing with anything. Navy and kelly green (or pink) for spring, yes please.  Navy with oranges/rusts for fall, um I’ll go back for seconds.  Navy on navy or navy with ivory or navy with basically anything.

Yes.

How does black get all the play when navy is such a sophisticated alternative?

Well it’s everywhere this fall. 

I’ll be featuring some of my favorite new acquisitions and some of my wish list items.  One of which I can’t show you today because it’s in next week’s fall trend (hint hint, it’s both perpendicular and parallel). 

Navy is THE easiest trend to incorporate because it automatically goes with everything in your closet. 

So the cheapest way to pick up a little navy is to add one of these cute tops.

This gorgeous wrap solid navy number from Banana Republic would look gorgeous with some bright plum or rust pants for fall.

Or, if it’s still warm where you are for fall, try one of these lighter numbers with navy in the print.  I picked up the striped one with orange from LOFT and my daughter heartily endorsed (she does that now that she’s in 6th grade) and the popover from Gap is versatile enough to dress down for soccer or up for work:

For fall weekends, throw this navy ombre ponco on with your jeans and booties.  Not only does it capitalize on the navy trend, but ponchos and ombre coloring is on the rise everywhere.  Think you’ll look too much like Clint Eastwood? Throw caution to the wind, and a little extra make up on, and embrace your inner spaghetti western cowboy:

If you’ve actually been loving all the long floral prairie dresses from Target to Nordstrom, then don’t let me stop you. Let’s just tailor it a bit more and throw in navy as the base color to make it fresh for fall.  I love how Ann Taylor is styling this midi dress with boots:

Or even go simpler, a shoe, a handbag, a trouser or jeans (and if you throw in high waisted, you are REALLY on trend, I just can’t pull them off).  Solid navy. Simple. Sophisticated.  Find them anywhere – Ann Taylor, DSW, Nordstrom’s, pic your fav. 

Alright, next week is the BIGGEST trend for the fall and I’m here for it.  What are you seeing in stores that you love? Is it fun to think about fashion after nearly TWO YEARS of abdication?

Sharing Our Stories

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Recently, I was voxing my best friend about some struggles our family is having with someone aging.  A few days later, she told me about a client who just came to their office.  The husband was struggling with the same thing we were experiencing.  And when she shared our experiences with him, he looked relieved.  As she commented, “it’s just nice to know you’re not the only one going through it.” 

This has been the refrain in my life over and over. 

My best friend group telling each other, don’t apologize for sharing, that’s what we do, we share our stories and it helps. It serves a purpose. 

I was on the phone with an old friend this weekend who was suffering.  She commented through tears, thank you so much for sharing your story (cancer) because it’s helping so many women. 

Lisa Jo Baker recently posted, “Joy is multiplied when it’s shared.”  But suffering, when shared, divides the pain. Shares it. Breaks it up.  We shouldn’t be compelled to only share the joy.  The pretty.  The good.  Others know they’re not in it alone when we share the hard too. 

Ann Voskamp recently released a blog post sharing some of the gut punch grief she’s experiencing after her father died.  She told of a tree which had been cut down and yet showed signs of life.  She writes, “What the ecologist discovered was that the tree stump’s roots have been grafted together with roots from other trees, something that is known to happen when trees sense they can share resources with the trees around them.  That’s the miracle: Cut down lives can revive when we share our lives.” 

By you sharing what you’ve been through, you’ll help the next person going through it after you. 

I recently heard a pastor share one of my favorite verses in preaching this same message: And they overcame by the blood of the Lamb and the word of their testimony. (Rev. 12:11)

The word of their testimony. That’s just someone sharing their story. It has the power to help others overcome.

We must share our stories. 

The broken places.  Busted and patched up chapters. Threadbare souls. 

Because it doesn’t just lighten the load for the sharer, it lets those in the same circumstances know they aren’t alone. 

Marriage is hard for everyone.  Parenting can be a kick in the face. Infertility. Alzheimer’s. Cancer. Finances. Job loss. Broken friendship.

That is all a tapestry of my own personal story. 

But just a piece. 

It’s woven in there with threads of gold and sunlight too. 

Triplets. Promotions. Marriage. Satisfaction. Travel. Sunsets. Adventure. Good wine. Best pals. Swimming pool cannonballs. Leadership. Rollercoasters. Graduation. Belly laughs. 

Go tell your story. And I’ll keep sharing mine.

On The First Day of Sixth Grade

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You went to middle school today.

And even though this is the evening and you’re now home, I’m still processing it.

I have far fewer words of advice as you reach this stage. I’m confident I can do far less to help. 

You are growing and able to do so much on your own. 

More than just being able to cook and load the dishwasher and start a load of laundry. I’m thrilled you know how to do all that of course (even if you choose NOT to), but it’s the other stuff. 

Navigating difficult conversations.

Making new people feel welcome. 

Pushing past the really hard parts. 

Figuring out which decision to make without me.

I’m still here. And available to encourage, advise, support, cheer, cry, whatever. But I see, even this week, that some of it is going to require your navigation.

Last night, when one of you was really sad and faced with some pressure and a hard decision, I said, I can’t make this decision for you. You’re going to have to make the choice. And if you decide this one thing, then you’re going to need to go have a conversation with an authority figure you respect.  I’m here to let you cry and to support your decision, but this one, well it’s for you.

You’re no strangers to me liking to run things. Organizing things. Control things.

So on this first day of sixth grade, I’m working really hard too.  I’m releasing some things.  Things that I would do differently. Choices I would have made instead. One of you said this week, when we disagreed about which path to take on a middle school option, You can’t make me and I’m not going to do that.

You are right to stand up to me. And, maybe I don’t say it enough, you should trust yourself.

Of course you can’t make all the decisions.  You’re growing and learning and you’ll probably do a million stupid things in the next three years. Lord knows I did. It’s hormones. Don’t worry. It can’t be helped, really.

But you, each of you, have good instincts. You know yourself.  Trust your instincts. Make the choice that doesn’t feel easy if you know it’s the right one.

If though, I could offer you a piece of advice, make it out of strength not out of fear of failure.

Confidence can be hard to come by, especially in middle school.  Everything is changing and insecurity is often the default.

If I push you, it is not because I’m trying to be a tyrant.  (Well, most of the time.) I ask you WHY you are making that choice because I want you to learn to ask yourself that question.

Are you worried you’re not good enough? That maybe you’ll embarrass yourself? Are you worried someone won’t like you or you won’t fit in?

Then reevaluate your decision.  These are not the reasons to say yes or no to a path.

On the other hand, does it fit you? Does it bring you joy? Are you passionate about it? 

If you’re making choices because of these reasons, then you do it, go boldly, and fight me if I’m pushing you away from this. (You might have to remind me I said that.)

And before you make any decision, did you talk to God? Did you take the time to pray about it? Is this choice consistent with what you know God calls us to do?

Each of you is the most precious gift. I watched you walk into this school that I’m so utterly grateful that we have and I just felt proud.

I’m proud of all you have endured. The setbacks. The losses. I know there’s been cancer and COVID and hurricanes and floods in your lower school years. But you are resilient. 

God was just showing off when He sent us you three.  Really, it was audacious.  I am still overwhelmed.

I love you.

You’re incredible.

Go blow middle school out of the water.

Love always and forever, Mom

Six Months Later

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Six months ago, I walked into MD Anderson alone (because of COVID) to have a malignant tumor cut out of my right breast. 

Six months ago. 

There are days it feels like I just finished but most of the time it feels more like years. 

I wanted to write to mark the milestone. 

I haven’t been back in to MD Anderson since early May. 

My follow up appointments come in September and October.  I’ll have new imaging to confirm all is clear and will continue on that twice a year schedule until they tell me I’m allowed to go back to annual appointments. 

I’m taking Tamoxifen and will be on some sort of estrogen blocking drug for five years.  My tumor was estrogen positive so these meds help to limit recurrence. 

Before we left for Bar Harbor I thought it had caused blood clots, a possible side effect, so I sat in a couple of ERs.  Finally, I got in to see my primary doctor, and it wasn’t blood clots but just bad leg cramps. Another side effect. The oncologist allowed me a three week break from the medicine, but now I’ve resumed. I’m still having the cramps but they are manageable. 

Besides the tiny white pill, there are other side effects. 

My right breast (this is yucky but the unvarnished truth) itches all the time.  I’m assuming it is all that scar tissue healing but it drives me insane.  And you can’t exactly walk around scratching your side boob. 

Laugh. Sigh.

Bras don’t fit quite right. I just bought three new ones and it’s better, but I’d rather be braless.  That is usually frowned upon in Corporate America though.  Actually, it’s frowned upon anywhere in American for a mom in her 40s. 

The most painful side effect is from the radiation.  I’ve lost some range of motion in my right shoulder.  It hurts to lay on my right side. I have a hard time getting some tops on and off. 

My friend and I have started working out together again in the mornings (5:15 – yawn!).  I’ve noticed that it feels like my right shoulder and chest muscles are shredding as I work out. But I’m hopeful the pain will lessen with workouts.  Maybe this new work out regime will not only help me lose the pandemic/cancer pounds, but also really improve my strength and range of motion on the right side.  I take responsibility for having let it go this long without working it more.

Besides all this physical stuff, there is another less tangible side effect.

Overall, DURING the cancer, I was pragmatic. I try to be efficient. Action oriented. Craft a to do list and then cross things off. 

So I did that with cancer.  Talk to these people. Get these doctors. Calendar these items.

KNOCK. IT. OUT.

I even had people say, kindly and supportively, if anyone can kick cancer’s butt, it’s you.

We all know that’s not true. Cancer does not care if you are efficient or action oriented. It is no respecter of age or gender or disposition.  (Sadly, much like COVID.)

Yet, I DID ALL THE THINGS.

Except. I don’t know that I ever processed it.  I’m not sure I grieved. 

There are places emotions have leaked out, but not so much in the cancer space. 

Then I was asked to share my story to a cancer support group.  The two women who run the group chatted with me over Zoom and asked me to share my story with them.  So I started walking through what happened.  And I just started crying.

I had no control over it.

It even caught me off guard.

I remember saying, through tears, as I shared, I guess this is all still really fresh. 

So I’m looking back at that time and figuring out if there’s some emotional work I need to be doing too.  If the physical work is necessary, and overdue, isn’t the mental and emotional? 

The absolute best side effect of cancer has been helping others with their diagnosis.  Three weeks to the day after my last radiation appointment, I was able to connect with three women who received their first diagnosis.  I had a coffee.  A conference call.  Made a cancer bag like others did for me.  I feel so honored to be able to walk with others through this valley. 

But instead of just jumping in with both feet to help, which my little Enneagram 3 Wing 2 does on autopilot, I need to process some things as well. If I’m actually going to be of any help to others struggling, I need to be healthy. And honest about what cancer meant in my life and my family’s lives.  Honest about what it means for our future. 

It’s six months today.

I am incredibly grateful for my outcome.

Overwhelmed by the people who surrounded us. 

Indebted to a Savior and Heavenly Father who held me through it all. 

And I’m hopeful. For what’s next.