I’m an attorney, so I’ve gotten my fair share of verdicts. Honestly, they’re generally good verdicts. If I don’t think I can get a good verdict, then the case generally settles.
But recently I’ve been thinking about life verdicts. Verdicts you have no control over. Some good, some bad, some expected, some complete surprises. I’ve had friends recently confronting serious and unexpected verdicts with a faith and grace that astonishes me.
I’ve had my own tough verdicts personally: “Dad’s leaving,” “Grandaddy has brain cancer,” “You may not be able to have children.” But you process verdicts differently when they are verdicts handed down about your children. Any mothers out there know that. “He’s so advanced – he shouldn’t even know that at this age.” “They are gorgeous!” “Isn’t he funny?” You puff your chest out with pride as if it was you who designed and formed them instead of the Creator! But then you get other verdicts that punch you in the gut in a way you’ve never experienced. I had several of these in the NICU. I know other triplet mommas that have received far more challenging and trying verdicts that we ever did, but still, we struggled with the string of verdicts we received over that month. God was faithful through it all and our kids are wonderful and beautiful and healthy.
Recently, we had a 15 month check up. And we got some more verdicts. Not great verdicts. None of them life threatening, thank the Lord, by any means. But they weren’t positive either. So we’re addressing those. Praying for peace. Seeking God’s guidance and wisdom for the doctors. Giving extra kisses every night at bedtime because we know friends that have struggled with far harder verdicts and we are so blessed. So blessed.
Regardless of whether you are getting good or bad verdicts right now, have faith that it’s in His hands. As I posted earlier, we couldn’t possibly understand His plan in our finite minds, but we know He wins the trial. And these intermediate verdicts are just that – intermediate. The final verdict is peace and rest and everlasting life with our Heavenly Father where there is no suffering and no disappointing verdicts.