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Gindi Vincent

The Dish on Career, Fashion, Faith, and Family

network

Net-Work or Connect-For?

May 9, 2019 by Gindi Leave a Comment

Every year for the past several years, I’ve had the great fun of speaking at a leadership academy in San Antonio that’s the brain child of a cool woman who’s become a dear friend.

Today, we were talking about important relationships for leaderships and developing networks.

Lately, I’ve spoken a lot about networks and why I think networking is a misnomer. Think about it. Who wants to “network?” It makes you imagine a large net with trapped fish and, well, WORK!

And the reality is, if you are networking to build your career “just” to network, then it isn’t likely to bring you much value. It’s purposeless and therefore unlikely to yield strategic results.

But if instead, we make it about connecting, it starts to become a little less intimidating. I brand this exercise, “Connect-For.” When we look at what we’re connecting FOR, then we become a lot more likely to want to do it and to enjoy it once we’re in an environment with new people.

So how do we figure out how to connect purposefully and build that, dare we say, ‘network?’

Let’s look at four questions we should answer before connecting: Why, Who, Where, and How?

First up, WHY? What’s the point? Well, there really is a point. Have you ever moved to a new city and need connections there? Are you passionate about something (animals, children’s education, gardening) and you want to learn more or find like-minded people? Do you want to move into a new industry and need to learn more about it? Are you trying to grow in your career in your company and want to understand how things work?

There are lots of reasons WHY you need to expand your connections. But unless you sit down with a paper and pen and write down what’s important to you and where you have gaps in your connections, you’ll never know. Without knowing the motivation for your action, you won’t be focused, know who to look for, or where to start looking.

Once you know the why, you need to ask WHO you should be connecting with. There are three broad categories: within your company, within your industry but outside your company, and within your area of passion (e.g., running, sports, arts, food, etc.). Make a chart. Put these areas on the left column. Then, across the top row, put these three categories: Senior, Peer, and Junior.

Do you have folks names in each of those buckets? Are you building up someone junior to you in your company? Are you connecting with an executive in your industry? Do you have friends that like the same things you like? You don’t need a dozen folks for each of these categories. In fact, you probably shouldn’t have that many because heavens know you can’t keep up with them all. But if you have no one’s name in one of these categories, then you have identified a hole in your connections. One you can strategically set out to fill.

Once you know the why and who of connecting, it’s time to figure out the where and how. The WHERE depends entirely on who you are: a planner or last minute actor, a goal setter or activist, the life of the party or quiet conversationalist. I love getting to know someone. Poor co-workers who travel with me get pulled into the deep end fast. I find out about their relationships, their background, their family, their interests, etc. No light-hearted weather conversation for me. No sirree. So bopping from person to person with cocktail conversation in a crowded room is not a good fit for me. But it may be perfect for you.

When you have figured out the forums that are most comfortable to you, then cast a broad net over where you find new connections. Industry associations, professional groups, alumni associations, faith or community organizations, kid sporting events, etc. The list is endless. Identify places that play well to your strengths (volunteering) at a place you’ll encounter folks who could fill in your connection gaps.

Finally, that gets us to the HOW. First things first, DO IT. If you’ve taken the time to strategize about how to build a more powerful connection base, then you need to do it. Set goals. Put smaller target goals on your calendar and also calendar activities.

I keep a standing “lunch with friends” on my outlook calendar on Fridays from 11:30 to 1. I don’t always take it but this enables me to keep the time open for connection activities. These connection activities are the first things to fall off our priority list otherwise. Find ways to support, help, or otherwise connect new people you meet. Set out to find commonalities you have with new connections. You absolutely have them, and you usually can find them when you’re looking.

Most of all, be patient. Relationships take a long time to build. In a Twitter, cell phone, high-speed Internet era, we expect everything to happen fast. Relationships don’t. They take time to build. Time to develop trust and reliability. Most research says it takes seven to ten independent connection points to actually cement a relationship. So hang in there. And be intentional. It will pay off.

Filed Under: Leadership Tagged With: network

Face Time

October 27, 2015 by Gindi Leave a Comment

facetime

I recently stayed up late at a girlfriend’s house while visiting her town for a speech.  We curled up on her oversized sofa with a glass of wine and laughed and reminisced and swapped harried working momma stories.

As the topic turned to work and opportunity and advancement, she began to share a story about an up-and-coming woman she knew.  What surprised her the most was the woman’s failure to take advantage of key networking opportunities.  She didn’t attend important company events.  When she was given an invitation to attend a client dinner with partners, the only junior member to be invited, she accepted the invitation but then called in “sick” two hours beforehand.  When my friend relayed what happened when asked by one of the partners, the partner said, “yeah right she was sick, she got a better invitation this weekend.”

What on earth?

This is terrible!

Yet it is becoming more and more prevalent.

All of us Gen-Xers learned as we moved up the career ladder to seize every opportunity to network with external clients or executives within our organization when given the chance (or find a way to seize the chance).  Building those relationships during non-office hours are critical.  Whether it’s volunteering with a non-profit, attending a gala for a key person’s favorite group, or attending a small group cocktail hour, there is no substitute for face time.

I asked my friend, “How’s her work?  Is she any good?”  In response, my friend said, “Actually, her work product is very good.  She may take a little too long getting it done, but she’s smart.  It’s just that…”

What was hanging at the end of the sentence?  Her and her partners concern the junior woman can’t be relied upon, can’t develop business, and can’t properly attend to their client network needs.  She had already, early in her career, developed a reputation she wouldn’t put in the time to build out of office relationships.

“Maybe when they are all the bosses, this won’t be important.  Maybe it will be okay everything is done on-line.  But right now, we need people to show up.”

No amount of good work will translate into an ability to advance if we don’t recognize the need to develop relationships.  I like to think, despite what my girlfriend suggests, that the ability to build and grow a network and supporters is timeless.  Even when the whole corporate world becomes virtual, there is no substitute for face time.

Regardless of where you are in your career, your first job out of college or C-suite executive, putting in face time at events important to your colleagues, your employees, your bosses (and you always have a boss, even as CEO), your clients, and your supporters translates into strong relationships.  You remain relevant when you engage in informal, non office, conversations.  You become a trusted member of other’s circles.  You meet new people through these events which grows your networks to even further advance your career as well as brings personal fulfillment in having an interesting and diverse set of professional relationships.

Face Time.  It’s not just for iPhones.  It’s every woman’s career necessity.

Filed Under: Leadership Tagged With: face time, leadership, network

Total Leadership Makeover – Trajectory Change

July 15, 2014 by Gindi Leave a Comment

It’s leadership Tuesday and I’ve mentioned one feature making a regular appearance will be Total Leadership Makeovers (with your help!).  In Learning to Lead, I applied the “experts” advice to real life career challenges and tried to explore a way out of the rut or past the roadblock.  Here’s a question I received after a speaking engagement (feel free to email me yours):

Currently, I’m working in the litigation health arena, but I’m determined to cross over into oil and gas work.  In particular, I’d like to work in-house for an upstream oil and gas company involved in horizontal drilling.  It’s an exciting time for the industry, and oil and gas is the perfect combination of contract and property law, my favorite subjects from law school.  Additionally, I’ve seen first hand the business side from family in the fracking business which furthered my interest.

Well, first of all, congratulations on thinking outside the box and not letting your current field deter you from pursuing interests in an entirely different field that you believe will suit your interest and talent better.  I made a similar switch and found incredible career satisfaction with the change.  Similarly, it’s smart that you are focused on what your long-term goal is (keeping in mind there may need to be an interim step to get you there, e.g., private practice with energy experience) and have aligned it with your talents and interests from your studies.  Finally, knowing the business is a critical step so having someone in your family in the business will go a long way in helping you identify the best opportunities.

Here were my five “makeover” tips for this curious attorney:

1. Consider attending Women’s Energy Network events – you have to be in the energy industry to join as a member, but WEN lunches are open to non members as well and you would make contacts within the industry and hear more energy topics.

(Now granted I have to press out the organization that I am President of, but this truly is a critical element to moving into an entirely new field!  Find an industry organization so you can begin to develop your contacts.  Your network is KEY!)  {===>Click to Tweet}

2. Consider joining the Oil & Gas bar association – there you would hear more about ways to engage with industry and discover emerging developments as well as hiring opportunities.  (Even if your field isn’t legal, building contacts in specialty organizations will keep you up to date on what’s happening in the field – everyone from marketers to accountants have subspecialty groups.)

 3. Find out if your company or firm does, or would be willing to do, pro bono partnerships with energy companies. I have worked in pro bono clinics for women and children on both sides of my practice (when in private practice and now in-house) with people on the other side because they developed a partnership pro bono program.  Everyone wins – you do good for the community and build your network.

 4. Attend some energy CLEs – energy attorneys are there so you win with knowledge and contacts.

5. Work with legal recruiters who have an energy focus – honestly, contacting recruiters in the area of your interest if you are in the job market in the short-term really is a necessary step.  However, you may want to build your muscles in the above areas before deciding to move; build your resume and your knowledge base while you have the comfort of a steady paycheck.  And be willing to pay for it – you shouldn’t make an employer pay for things in areas that won’t benefit your current practice.

So what’s your best advice?  And what’s your current predicament?  Email me your suggestions for the next makeover.

Filed Under: Leadership Tagged With: network, total leadership makeover

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